Eternal: Chapter Nine, Part 2

Ian stopped by later that day as I was preparing supper. Nick was helping me, but decided to run to the grocery store for some rolls when Ian arrived. I know he knew I was having individual conferences with people, so I wasn’t sure if he’d gone because of that or simply because he really wanted rolls at dinner.

“Hey, love,” Ian greeted as Nick ran out the door. He kissed my cheek and asked, “Would you like some help.”

“You don’t have to,” I said, washing my hands. “I can finish later.”

“What are you making?” he asked, rolling up his sleeves and washing his hands.

“Veggie fried rice with sesame chicken. Nick says he knows a great recipe for the chicken,” I answered. “I’m cleaning the chicken. You can cut it up if you want.”

“How big?”

“Bite sized chunks.”

He nodded, taking up the knife and working on the breast already on the cutting board. “So do you have a new tagline?”

“Of course.” I had been thinking about it for some time and decided to stick with miracles as the central theme. “The next set will be based around ‘miracles are unstoppable,’ because after that set airs, no matter what happens, no matter what people want to believe, they know,” I said, working on removing excess fat and bits of gristle from the next breast. “Most people won’t want to live with the guilt, and even if they can, someone else will step up.”

“You’re right about that,” he said, setting the knife down. “What do you want me to do with these?”

“There’s a bowl to your right;” I pointed to the ceramic bowl with the chunks Nick had already cut up. “The last set of commercials will be based on ‘miracles never die.’ That one isn’t aimed to the people as much as it is to the government. They need to know this won’t stop with just us. Others like us, and even unlike us, are tired. Tired of being lied to, exploited, mistreated in general.”

“I can do that,” he assured me as I handed him the next breast, starting on the last one. “Did I tell you how much I love designing your ‘miracle’ commercials?”

“Only a couple of times;” I smiled, unable to help myself.

“Well, I do.” His eyes darted my way for a fraction of a second, reflecting the grin on his lips. “How have you been doing?”

“Good, thank you,” I responded, not even thinking about it. It was one of those automatic responses hardwired into me; I would have said ‘good, thank you’ even if the world was burning to ashes around me. “Yourself?”

“I’m good.” After a moment, he added, “But you weren’t.”

He finished chopping as I finished cleaning. I handed him the last breast and then washed my hands; then I scrubbed the sink with hot, soapy water and bleach.

“I’m fine now,” I persisted, rinsing the suds down the drain. I checked the rice, though I wasn’t sure how to tell if the rice cooker was working or not; I hadn’t used one before, but Nick seemed to trust it.

“But you weren’t.”

I wanted to retort snidely about how that was obvious, but Ian wasn’t attacking me. I knew that. He was doing what Caroline hadn’t—though I had wanted her to. “Why does it matter?”

“Because I felt it,” Ian said, looking up from what was left of the chicken breast. “You’re my friend, Abriel—Leirba—whatever you prefer. Maybe it’s because you’re also air, but my connection to you is different from anyone else. When you hurt, I feel it as if it were my own pain.”

“I’m sorry,” I whispered, turning my back to him and going about cleaning up. I didn’t want him, or anyone else, to feel what I felt, especially not when I had been that badly off. But I couldn’t control that, and I doubted he could either. If he could have, I was sure he would have stopped after I almost died—well, did die, kind of.

“Did you want to talk about it?” Dropping the last of the chicken into the bowl, he placed the cutting board in the sink and ran some hot bleach water for it to soak. He washed his hands, saying, “I have time if you wanted to.”

“I can’t,” I said, trying to find something else to do and discovering the rest of it Nick would have to finish as he hadn’t left instructions for me to follow.

“Can’t…or won’t?” The way he said it wasn’t hurtful or mean, but it still stung. No one else had questioned me about that, and I had started to assume people wouldn’t. Now that someone had, I couldn’t remember how I had planned to reply.

“I’ve talked to Drei already, and I am feeling better. But I can’t really talk about it with anyone else because it would lead to a conversation about something I can’t discuss.” I knew it sounded terrible and pathetic, but I hoped it would sate some fraction of his curiosity.

“I won’t ask;” Ian walked around to the other side of the counter and sat down. “But I’m here if you ever want to, even if you’re not supposed to.”

Silence found its way between us for a short while before I decided to ask the question I hadn’t been able to ask Caroline: “Is something wrong with Caroline?”

“What do you mean?” he asked, leaning forward on his elbows.

“She seemed weird when she was here earlier. Like she was overcompensating for something by being less argumentative.”

Ian’s head bobbed slightly, though he didn’t say anything. It was like he was debating whether or not to tell me about it. I would understand if he didn’t—it was only fair. But I was hoping he’d find it decent to share.

“Her parents dropped by for a visit a few days ago and finally left today,” he said, almost as if that answered it.

A couple years ago, when I had met Caroline’s parents, they seemed like perfectly normal people who may have loved their only daughter a touch too much. However, appearances, especially in the world Caroline and I both hailed from, were everything but meant nothing about the real person underneath. And there was definitely something about her parents because, that entire vacation, even Ian had been stressed. It was the first time I had seen him stressed in a subdued, biting his tongue, way. And Caroline’s stress had been off the charts. I had never had the opportunity to know why that was, and I had been too preoccupied with my own problems to ask then.

“What is it about her parents she doesn’t like?” I asked, hopefully in a way that suggested I wasn’t forcing him to answer.

He opened his mouth to say something before closing it. Exhaling, his lips curling upward, he noted, “You never got to be alone with them. They are two real pieces of work.”

Eternal: Chapter Eight, Part 6

That’s where I stayed. It felt like an eternity that I lay there, my hand slowly bleeding—not fast enough to make a mess, just a slow, almost gelatinous, ooze—the carpet absorbing my tears, and me, suffocating, despite not even having to breathe. And the pain; the wrenching, burning pain clawing at my insides.

“Abriel, we will be late if you do not—,” Drei called as he walked through the door, stopping as he no doubt saw the mess I had created. He had run an errand and promised to be back in time for us to make it to the party.

He sat me upright, propping me against himself and holding me in his strong arms. I still couldn’t stop myself, even with him here. Nothing he said made any sense for a while, it was too soft and I was focused too much on what was happening inside me. When I wasn’t crying so hard, he lifted me and laid me in bed.

“I will be right back,” he promised, wiping the wet hair back from my forehead.

Drei spoke to someone in the other room, probably on the phone to tell them we weren’t coming. Caroline would yell at me for it later and Ian would probably tell her to shove it. Or someone else might. I tried imagining how it would pan out, but the distraction was useless; I rolled over, sobbing and crying again. I was coughing so hard my chest ached.

He was back again, propping me against his chest, rubbing my back until the coughing stopped. Then he cleaned and wrapped my cut hand. At least that’s when I suspected he did it; I didn’t actually know for sure. When he was done with that, he wrapped me in his arms and rocked me back and forth. I wasn’t sure how it was possible there were still tears left in me, but there were more, even if they only came quietly now.

Drei held me at least until I fell asleep. I was still in his arms when I awoke. His eyes were closed and his head bowed over me. I felt exhausted—emotionally and physically. Closing my eyes again, I only wanted to sleep, or try to anyway.

“We should talk first,” Drei said softly. It was strange hearing his voice in the silence, more so because he sounded worn and weary, almost fragile. “What happened?”

I tried to bury my face in his chest, but he turned and lifted my chin with a hooked finger.

“Something is wrong.” Had I not been so exhausted, I wondered if I would have thought that was the stupidest statement ever. Of course, something was wrong. The last time I cried anywhere near that much was when he kicked me out years ago, and, even then, it hadn’t hurt quite this much.

Shaking my head, I attempted pulling away from him. I loved him, but he did this to me. And yet I didn’t want him to feel guilty about it. If I told him, that’s what would happen, but he might be able to help me work through it so I felt better; if I didn’t tell him—I didn’t really want to think about that. None of what was going through my head was making any sense.

Drei wouldn’t let go of me; he wasn’t hurting me, but he wasn’t going to let me escape and avoid this.

“I know you need rest,” he murmured as he lowered his face until his forehead nearly touched mine. “But we need to talk about this, Abriel. What happened?” he repeated, as if I had forgetten the question. I was only trying to avoid answering it after all. “Tell me.”

“No.” Part of me still wanted to pull away from him, but part of me wanted to fall asleep in his arms again. Either way, I knew I didn’t want to answer that question, especially not now. “You don’t want to know.” I buried my head in my hands.

“If you are hurting, Abriel, I want to know.”

“Why? It’ll only hurt you.”

“That means nothing to me. Your health, your wellness means everything to me.”

Glancing up at him, I found his face already contorted in pain, all because I wouldn’t talk to him. That was what I’d been hoping to avoid. “It sucks,” I said lamely, unable to meet his gaze. “I don’t have a reflection.”

His fingers ran through my hair and massaged my scalp, though his unease and worry snaked around me. “I should have told you.”

“It’s why you took down all the mirrors.” I didn’t need him to confirm it because I already knew it was why. He wanted to protect me from that truth, and as I had become considerably with other things—like sating my hunger and the movement—I hadn’t cared. “That’s mostly why.”

“Such a trivial thing?”

“No, Drei. It wasn’t trivial.” He didn’t understand. By the time he went out into the world, he was numb from what he had done. He didn’t notice the world moving on around him, leaving him behind. “It was the last thing I could stand losing.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, Drei, I’ve been giving up and leaving behind so much. For my element, for my vampire…and it was just building on top of itself. One thing on top of another; something old would come up and add…and when I couldn’t even see what I looked like—couldn’t even prove I still existed—” My voice cracked as a new wave of tears pressed at my eyes. I had hoped my tear ducts were empty.

“I had no idea.”

“I didn’t want you to,” I admitted, sniffing, trying to hold back the tears.

“You do exist, Abriel,” he said, wrapping me tighter in his arms.

“How can I—”

“Because if you ever wonder, I will hold you. I will say anything you want. I will kiss you and do whatever you desire of me. I will stay by your side until you feel better,” he promised, his amethyst eyes pale and serious. “To me, you exist…and because you do, I am happier than I have ever been.”

Wrapping my hands around the back of his neck, I buried my face into his chest—breathing him in and failing to quell the tears now rolling down my cheeks—and this time he didn’t stop me. One of his arms was wrapped around my waist, his other hand lost in my hair.

Eternal: Chapter Seven, Part 6

“It is not yet time for that.” He reached out a hand to me, but I didn’t want to accept it if he was going to ask me to consider never doing so again. “We are not the choice you must consider. We are almost there.”

I stared at him for a moment longer—ensuring he meant what he said—before taking his hand. Drei pulled me into an embrace, holding me tight, and my doubts dissipated as I breathed him in, inhaled his luscious scent. Part of me was frightened by what he might ask of me, but I had trusted him this long. A little longer wouldn’t hurt.

We continued and a knot started forming in my stomach. The further we walked, the more I remembered this place, and, if I was right, we were heading toward my old neighborhood. That meant the choice dealt with either my mother—my adoptive mother, my dad’s wife—or Dad. But the likelihood of my dad being home was slim; before I’d left, he was rarely home. And if this was for my mother…that wasn’t even a choice, really. I wanted nothing to do with her, and that I’d decided long before I’d left.

Sure enough, we ended up at the end of the drive leading to the gate of my old neighborhood. I was grateful we were here and not at the school; I wasn’t sure how I might have handled that, but this I could handle—maybe. There were a lot of good memories here, at least, even if there were some less than pleasant ones to wish me off.

“Your first choice,” he said, stopping at the bottom of the drive. “We can continue, or we can check into our hotel for the night.”

I stared through the darkness at the neighborhood ahead, contemplating the option before me. To go on might mean having to face one of my parents, and I wasn’t sure I was ready for that. On the other hand, I wasn’t sure I wanted to just disregard it all. Against my better judgment, I had bottled up the final events here years ago and avoided thinking on them when I could. The downside was I never found closure for myself, and letting go of my own emotions was much more difficult than helping someone else release theirs. So while I wasn’t sure if I was ready for confrontation or reunion—whichever awaited me—I wasn’t particularly keen on giving up a chance for resolution.

“If we continue, there will be one more choice for you to make,” Drei said.

“One more choice.” He nodded beside me. “We’ve come this far,” I said, “why not a little further?”

“Very well.” He turned to start along the outside perimeter.

At first, I thought to suggest we go through the front as I used to know the night guard fairly well; then I realized how long it had been and how much I didn’t know about this place anymore. If it was a different guard, he would probably call ahead to verify my identity and then whatever second choice I had to make would be made for me. Even if it was the same guard, many of my team hadn’t recognized me in my new state and we had lived together. Without a suitable alternative, I jogged to catch up to Drei.

“When I used to visit you at night, I took a back way in, never through the gate. They would have asked too many questions.” After a moment we came to a tall tree and Drei smoothly climbed up to the first set of branches. “Here.”

Though he reached down to help me up, after glancing around—mostly using my element to sense around us—I formed a block of air below me and was sitting on top of the wall in a moment. He smirked—probably at my ingeniousness—climbing the rest of the way and joining me.

“I take it no one is around but us?”

Nodding, I glimpsed over the wall. “Want a lift down?”

He nimbly jumped from the wall and landed in a low crouch on the other side. Slowly, using the air as an elevator, I joined him.

“Show off.”

“I am not the only one,” he said, smiling. “It is not much farther.”

“It’s just down the street.”

He nodded, a brightness to his eyes. I followed his lead out of this yard and onto the street.

In a couple of minutes, we were standing on the driveway of my parents’ house. I had never thought I would be there again—not this soon, anyway. It hadn’t changed from what I remembered, though it seemed larger and more intimidating now. Lights shone through various windows, mostly on the ground level.

“What’s my choice now?” I asked, looking up at him.

“I am not sure if you will take this opportunity, but I have felt for some time now that you left some things unfinished when you came with me,” he said, and as much as I wanted to, I couldn’t disagree with his conclusion. Maybe Caroline had rubbed off on me and now I wanted to disagree for the sake of disagreeing; I couldn’t be sure. “You must decide whether or not you’ll see your father.”

I had known that was coming. Despite my suspicions, I hadn’t given it much thought. Drei wouldn’t have brought me here if Dad wasn’t going to be home. But could I face him? After he had told me I was the only reason he could stand missing Mom, I’d left him without a word. There wasn’t a note. I hadn’t called, or written, or anything in the years I had been gone. Nothing, in all my experience, could suggest how this might play out. He could hate me for all I knew. Then again, he might be worse than before, and that would be my fault; no matter what anyone else said, it would be my fault, because I’d known how he was. He’d told me how bad he was.

A light came on in what I remembered as my old room. A backlit figure passed by the window and I wondered if that wasn’t Dad. My mind immediately filled with images of him wandering my old room, everything tidied and left in place like some kind of monument to my memory; I wanted to go to him, to show him I was okay and well and deeply regretting the hurt I must have caused him.

But what if he asked me to stay. Part of me would want to say yes, but I had Drei to think about; I had myself, and everyone else…not to mention my movement. I had to lead that; no one else could. If he asked, though…I felt obligated to say yes just thinking about it. Should I face my dad, I knew I wouldn’t have the heart to deny him.

“No,” I whispered, taking in the empty windows, the lifeless exterior, the cold building that once had been my favorite place in the world.

Drei waited until I turned away before he took my hand and we left. He didn’t ask why, though he probably knew; I had a feeling I was thinking loud enough for him to know anyway. But it was the best thing he could have done. As much as I wished I could see my dad again and make it up to him, now wasn’t the time. I wasn’t sure there would ever be a good time. Maybe after this was over, I could start to make amends.

Eternal: Chapter Seven, Part 1

Chapter Seven: Leading Change

“Drei isn’t back yet?” It had been over two weeks since I had spoken to Jake and everyone was out of school except Mikael—but he was on a brief break before the summer session. We were having our first meeting in a few hours and I hadn’t seen Drei since before I had started recruiting. I ran my hands through my mussed hair. “Why isn’t he back? He told you; I know he did.”

Valetta sat on the couch, watching me pace around the living room in my nightgown. She had told me he called a few days ago while I was asleep and promised to be back by now. But he wasn’t.

“You really should calm down,” she said before sipping from her teacup of blood. “Drei said he would return today, and he will.”

I wasn’t sure why I wasn’t calm to start with; it wasn’t like I was speaking to people I hardly knew. But this was an important day. They finally were going to know what our focus was going to be and I had this sinking feeling I was going to screw things up.

“Abriel,” she said gently, setting her drink aside and standing; she held me at arm’s length. “Stop worrying so much. Everything will go as planned and Drei will arrive safely.” Glancing at the clock on the wall, she added, “Besides, you had better change into something more presentable before Mitchell arrives with the others.”

I knew I was being childish in my resistance to Valetta’s soothing and distractions. It was petty of me to take out my frustrations at his absence and desire to communicate with me only through Mitchell and Valetta on everyone else. Although I knew this was my movement, I felt like this was something we were supposed to do together.

“He will be here, Abriel,” she asserted, squeezing my shoulders harder. “But you cannot reschedule this meeting. The others have lives, too.”

Part of me wanted to argue that I didn’t have a life anymore. That to have a life you had to be, you know, living. But I wouldn’t say that to Valetta; I wouldn’t even say that to Drei, though, honestly, I wasn’t sure how I felt about my turning anymore. I told myself if he was here, I wouldn’t be having these sorts of thoughts and everything would be fine.

“Okay,” I whispered, nodding my head. Of course it wasn’t really okay, but she did have a point. I couldn’t reschedule just because I felt like it. I was the leader, the coordinator; I had to appear as if everything was sunny and bright…even if it wasn’t.

An hour later, I had showered and changed into a summer dress and cropped bolero, ready for Mitchell and the rest to arrive. Valetta and I prepared snacks and chilled drinks with our remaining time.

“The door’s unlocked,” I called after someone knocked.

“Good God, Ian;” Caroline gasped, taking in the food and the two finishing the preparations. “We’re early. I told you we didn’t have to rush.”

I hugged Ian, glad they were here and grinning at Caroline’s whining.

“She would have been another hour if I didn’t hurry her along,” he whispered in my ear.

Smiling, I thanked him and then embraced Caroline; she handed me a small gift bag. “What’s this?”

“It’s your Happy First Organizational Meeting present.”

Laughing, I started opening it as she insisted it wasn’t anything special. Inside were several small candles of varying scents.

“They all promote relaxation, which you’ll need a lot of,” she said, kicking her shoes into a corner near the door.

“She’s been researching aromatherapy for you,” Ian said, grabbing a finger sandwich and walking into the living room, winking a sapphire gem as he passed me.

Caroline hit his arm lightly, pouting through her smile. “So shoot me for trying to be considerate.”

“I love it,” I said, interrupting any argument before it started —even if it was playful. Hugging her briefly again, I left my present in the bedroom, then helped Valetta move the finger sandwiches, cookies, and brownies into the living room.

“So how long before everyone else shows up?” Caroline asked, taking a few cookies and the napkin Valetta offered her.

I sat on one of the extra chairs we had pulled into the living room. “Everyone else should arrive—” There was knocking at the door and Valetta made her way over there as I stood again. “—now.”

“Welcome back,” Valetta said to Mitchell as he kissed her cheek and wrapped his arms around her. She whispered something else into his ear and he let her go. Probably something about Drei not being back yet. Here came the kid gloves…not that my behavior this morning had suggested they were unnecessary. I shoved my emotions aside; I had to play hostess, after all.

“Welcome,” I greeted as Kora, Mikael, Xenia, and Jake walked through the door. I hugged each one, directing them to take a seat and help themselves. “What would everyone like to drink?”

Mitchell sat with them as Valetta helped me gather and deliver the drinks.

“Are Justin and Angeline coming?” Caroline asked as I handed her the lemonade she’d requested.

“I’m going to talk to them separately,” I said, taking my seat again.

“Who are Justin and Angeline?” Mitchell asked, cocking an eyebrow.

“My legal consultants.” Before anyone could freak out, I added, “Caroline and I hired them so we don’t have to worry about the legal side of things. She used Angeline during her revolution and it was apparent to me that she and Justin would make a good team. Any other questions before I introduce everyone and we begin?”

“Is Drei coming?” Jake inquired before drinking some of his water.

Everyone stared at me, waiting for the answer I didn’t really want to give. “He’s still out on business,” I said—my smile probably more on the forced side of the spectrum—before Valetta had a chance to interject. “Now, introductions. You all know me, and you should know that you’re supposed to call me Leirba from now on. I’m air; Ian is also.” I indicated to Ian with an open, upturned palm, then did likewise to each person in turn. “Caroline is fire. Kora and Mikael are earth. Xenia and Jake are water. We also have Valetta and Mitchell to help us. As we’ve mentioned already, Justin and Angeline are our legal consultants, but you probably won’t see much of them, if at all. And then there’s Drei, as well,” I finished, looking around at them all. “Any questions?”

“Am I not special enough to mention?” a familiar, masculine voice asked from behind me. “Or do you just not want my help?”

Eternal: Chapter Six, Part 7

It wasn’t difficult to track down to where Jake had disappeared; he had left in a terrible mood with a unique mix of emotions trailing behind him: disappointment, anger, hatred, self-loathing, and a touch of sorrow. The trail he left traversed campus and through the park nearby, down to the river on the edge of the field just beyond the park. He wasn’t much better off than when he’d left; if anything, he had just started bottling it all up again.

“Jake?” I asked, standing a few feet from where he was sitting on the bank. He stiffened, keeping his back to me and curling into himself. “Could you talk to me? Like a person who isn’t being purely defensive?”

When he didn’t respond, I sat next to him and waited a moment. He wasn’t running, which was a good thing, but something was definitely wrong. All of his bitterness wasn’t from normal circumstances. Something over the past few years had changed him. Never could I have imagined him so cold and hard.

“What’s wrong?” I tried, wanting him to open up to me. He’d feel better if he did, I was sure of it.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he said, staring fixedly at the water as if it was going to give him the answers he wanted. I would have told him it wouldn’t if I had thought it might help. “I don’t even know you, Leirba.”

Leaning back on the heels of my palms, I sighed. True, he was being a pain, but it was also true he wasn’t necessarily himself. Besides, anger wasn’t going to help me with this; it would only worsen things. “You do know me, so don’t even pretend.”

“Then why are you going by a different name, Abriel?” His eyes met mine; the brightness I had seen before was just a trick of the light. They were dull and lifeless; I wondered if the hint of childishness in his smile had also been an illusion. It was difficult to tell anymore. “It’s sketchy.”

“Drei wants me to go by Leirba for now. It’s really long and complex and I’m not really supposed to talk about it,” I said, having to look away from him. I wanted him to trust me, but I couldn’t even give him sufficient reason to. “Now what changed you?”

“Why are you here?” he asked instead. “Why now? Why not before?”

“Before what?” I inquired, hoping he’d say something to let me pry further.

No such luck. “Before now.”

It amazed me I could even be talking to the same person from all those years ago. The others, I could still see them, who they had been beneath who they had become. But every trace of who Jake had been…it was like it had all been erased.

“Before now I’d been figuring things out. I’ve been learning about myself and my movement, and some other stuff—”

“That you can’t talk about,” he finished bitterly. I winced at the daggers in his voice. “Well, while you were off doing whatever it was that was more important,” he spat, facing me, his face red and splotchy, contorted in a nasty combination of heartache and fury, “I was shipped from relative to relative until I was dumped into foster care, and then shipped from family to family.”

I was speechless for a moment, my mind absent of any response. “What happened to your mom?” I asked, remembering how he had told me she’d sent him to the camp for his protection. In his relation of it, she had promised to be there when he returned to her.

“The fucking government happened!” he screamed, tears coursing down his cheeks as his bottled emotions spewed forth. I tried to clear them away as best I could while letting him still go through the sensations. He needed to; he needed to feel again. He’d been making himself numb for too long and it was alienating him. “By the time I got back they’d picked her up.  My dad blamed me for everything; said if I’d never been born she’d never have been caught. He told me get the fuck out before he killed me. So I went to my grandparents, who sent me to one relative to another and to another until the last one didn’t want me either. I was dropped in their fucking system!” he yelled, pulling his knees to his chest and running his hands through his hair. “Do you have any idea how hard it is to hide in their fucking system?”

I pulled him into my embrace, knowing it wasn’t the foster care system he was angry at; it wasn’t even me. He felt like his father had told him the truth. It was his fault; he was the only one to blame.

“Jake,” I whispered, cradling him in my arms, rubbing his back and trying to limit how much of his pain he had to go through. There was so much and it was still so raw, as if he had avoided feeling any of it before now. “It’s okay. You’re okay. It isn’t your fault.”

He pulled away from me, his bloodshot eyes revealing how unworthy of my help he felt he was. “But it—”

“Your mother loves you,” I told him sternly. “She told you that, and she meant it. Nothing changed that,” I said, taking his hands in mine. He stared at me blankly, unsure how to respond; he wanted to believe me, but he had also spent so much time believing he was to blame. What I said seemed only like a happy pipe dream. “Nothing changes her love for you. Okay?”

He nodded slightly, wiping away his tears.

Eternal: Chapter Six, Part 2

Xenia was next on my list, not because I couldn’t find Jake first but because I wanted to save Jake for last. I knew there was probably going to be more for us to talk about; I would like to think I wasn’t avoiding the inevitable, but giving myself more time to prepare for it. I knew the likelihood of that being true was slim to none.

Valetta had found Xenia’s home, school, and even managed to find out her plans for the weekend—which involved some shopping, a movie, and dinner with friends. It was easier for Valetta because she hadn’t changed at all from when they had last seen her, but it was no use being bitter. I would have to figure out how I would talk to her alone and avoid keeping her from her plans for too long.

I sat in the middle of the mall, watching people pass for a while, wondering why I wasn’t seeing her anywhere. Then a group of giggling girls walked past and Xenia’s name was mentioned. There wasn’t a single blonde in the group, though. All of them had either dyed their hair blue or green, except for one girl who had chosen purple.

“I seriously did it;” the purple haired girl laughed, and I knew it was Xenia. Her looks may have changed, but her voice hadn’t—not much anyway. “I was not going out with him. He thinks we dyed our hair to make a statement about society and stickin’ it to the man.”

“But that’s not it at all;” one of her blue haired companions giggled.

“Exactly.”

Xenia whipped her head around for a moment in my direction before turning to her friends. “I’ll meet up with you at the boutique. There’s someone I have to see real quick.”

Her friends agreed and continued on as if this wasn’t unusual for her to be running off for a moment; she watched them for a short while. When they had all done their peeking over their shoulders and were back to laughing and gossiping, she turned around and took a seat next to me.

“She wasn’t kidding when she said you’d look different;” she crossed her legs at the knees, resting her chin on her hand.

“So she told you I was coming?” I asked, turning to face her.

“Of course she did. How else do you think she knew what I was doing today?”

“Makes sense;” I nodded slightly. “Did she tell you what I was coming to talk about?”

She shook her head, the purple locks escaping over her shoulder; she pushed them back behind her ear. “Valetta said she’d leave that for you.”

I debated whether to jump straight to business or not. I didn’t care to, but at the same time, she had already segued into it. But I wanted so much to ask about her hair. It had been a beautiful gold color and now, though still beautiful, it was purple. I was curious as to what prompted the change, especially since it wasn’t just her that had changed.

Then I remembered she was here with friends and my goal wasn’t to monopolize her time. If I had time at the end I’d ask, but she had already cut to the chase.

“I’m beginning my movement soon,” I started, deciding to just put it all on the table and see what she’d make of it. “Right now I’m recruiting everyone, yourself included. Don’t feel like you have to say yes; you don’t. It shouldn’t interfere with school, but you’d mostly be there for opinions and other kinds of input. The only downside is we have two years.”

Xenia nodded slowly, sitting back and crossing her arms, her eyes downcast as she contemplated my words. “Two years, is it?”

“It’s all I can guarantee.”

“And I’m guessing you’re going to say what this movement is about when everyone is together?”

“Of course. As soon as the school year is done for everyone.” I studied her carefully. If she didn’t say yes, I didn’t know who else I would choose. I had my mind set on her helping, but I’d ultimately have to respect her decision.

“I like the sound of a challenge,” Xenia said after a moment. “I don’t get enough of one as is, and it’ll be kind of fun to see some of the others again.”

“You don’t have any concerns?” I didn’t want to leave her with questions if I could help it—other than the main one, that is.

“Nope. It’s straightforward enough. I’m kind of looking forward to it,” she said, nodding her head, sitting forward on her hands.

Silence enveloped us despite the hustle and bustle of the crowds. It wasn’t long before I couldn’t help but ask—I knew if I didn’t soon she would excuse herself.

Eternal: Chapter Four, Part 2

Her tears subsided, but she still hid her face. Even with the thick knot of emotions released, she must have felt obligated to still be apologetic and culpable.

“I don’t blame you for anything.”

“But it’s all my fault. I brought you back into it and endangered you because of it,” she said, lowering her hands from her face; her cheeks glistened and her eyes were bloodshot.

“And this isn’t you. I need the old you, Caroline. The confident, almost-arrogant fighter who could be nice.”

Sniffling, she took the napkin and blew her nose. “For what?” Then before I could begin to explain, she said, “God you look so different. You’re so pale…but still beautiful. What happened to you? And why the hell did it take you so long to let me know you were alive?” There was the Caroline I knew and wanted, needed. I loved how she could change gears so quickly.

Smiling, partially because she was now, I said, “I am different, and that’s a really long story; but I can’t go into any of that right now.”

She nodded. “So long as you tell me sometime.”

“Sure;” I wasn’t certain that was a possibility, but I could discuss the likelihood with Drei.

“God, Abs, I just can’t get over that you’re not dead;” she laughed to herself. I wasn’t sure if she was going into hysterics, really happy, or if she was losing it altogether. I hoped it wasn’t the latter. “What’s with the different name, anyway?”

“Caroline,” I said, sitting forward on my elbows, “it’s my turn to run the show. I’m preparing to start a revolution—more a movement. I want you on my team.”

Her bronze eyes grew large and she seemed to restrain herself from dropping her jaw as well. “Really? I-I mean…I never figured you to be one for something like that.”

“Well, I am. And that’s also the reason behind the name.”

“So I’ll have to call you Leirba from now on?” When I nodded, she smiled and admitted, “I’m still going to call you Abs from time to time. But I’ll try to remember not to in public,” she promised, grinning.

“Will you be on my team?”

I watched as she sat back, wrapping her arms around herself and rubbing them. “Abs—Leirba,” she sighed, shaking her head and looking away. “I don’t know if I can do it. Thinking you died really made me think about things. And I decided I don’t want—oh how do I put this?” She stopped speaking, rubbing her temples as she searched for the answer she was seeking. “I don’t want to be part of that scene if people die because of it.”

“Caroline,” I said, drawing her attention and taking one of her hands in mine. “People will die whether or not they participate. Now, what I have in mind is less incendiary than yours was, and I’m going to do my best to ensure people aren’t hurt. But there’s no guarantee and I won’t promise you that it’ll all be okay, because it might not be.” Her eyes darted away and she hugged herself again. I could relate to her internal conflict, but when I’d been there it was in regards to my own safety. “What I can promise you, is that I will do everything in my power to keep this as safe as possible. I would hate to lose anyone I’m bringing into this.”

“And what about yourself?” she asked, staring at me. “Because I really don’t think I’m strong enough to lose you again.”

Holding both of her hands in mine, I said, “No worries, I’m considerably harder to kill.”

She nodded her head. “I’ll do it. I’ll be on your team.”

“Great;” I couldn’t stop smiling. Caroline was in. That was one of six, possibly seven if I found another fire elemental.

“If you’re going for more of a peaceful approach, you’ll want Ian, I’m guessing;” how did she know me so well? Both of us smiling made it seem like no time had passed, like we were scheming all over again. Only, this time our roles had changed.

Nodding, I added, “And lawyers. Good ones. I don’t have time for legal issues and I’m not doing this quietly. Don’t have time for that either.”

“I have the perfect lawyer,” she said, bobbing her head and pushing her crimson locks behind an ear. “What kind of timeline are we looking at anyway?”

“Two years,” I replied, finishing my chai latte.

“For what? Planning, initiating—”

“Everything.”

Her eyes were huge disks again, this time her jaw hanging open as well. “You’re insane.”

“I didn’t have much choice.” Before we could blow this into an entirely different conversation—one I didn’t feel like having six plus different times—I suggested, “How about we find Ian?”

“He’ll be excited to see you.” Caroline let the timeline topic drop, but her eyes sparkled in such a way as to say she was still going to ask about it. “He’s missed having you around, even though he handled it better than I did.”

Eternal: Chapter Four, Part 1

Chapter Four: Light My Fire

Valetta and Mitchell searched for a few people I had met at the camp whom I knew would be assets to the project if we could find them. I had absolute confidence in their ability. The only restraint I gave them, however, was not to approach them regarding the movement. That was something I needed to do personally.

Drei helped me find the one person locally I knew would be the most difficult to approach. Then, after insisting I adjust to introducing myself as Leirba, he disappeared, claiming he had something he needed to do. I didn’t know what he was doing but I trusted him, so I tried not to let the worry overrun my thoughts.

The day had been overcast but I had arranged a rendezvous after dusk, not wanting to risk frightening my guest with an unanticipated injury. We were meeting at a café. It had been forever since I had had a cinnamon chai latte and I couldn’t help breathing in the scent every few minutes to luxuriate in it; it smelled like heaven.

I had to wait quite a while for her to arrive—granted, I had been extremely early. When she walked through the door, I couldn’t help smiling at her. Her long red hair cascaded over her shoulders. She was wearing her classic skinny jeans paired with rainbow flats to match her tie-dye tee. Fashion aside, she wasn’t how I remembered her; her lips smiled, but sorrow and guilt made her cautious, tentative. Sleepless nights left dark circles under her eyes that showed through her concealer; she looked thinner.

“Caroline,” I called, catching her bronze eyes.

She smiled a little more warmly as she strolled up to the table. Cocking her head to one side and furrowing her brow slightly, she asked, “Have we met before? You look…familiar.”

“I’m Leirba,” I said, shaking her hand.

She gasped and grimaced; “Your hands are freezing.”

Folding my hands in my lap, I nodded my head in the direction of the empty seat. “Please…sit.”

“I’ll just get something—”

“Mocha chai?” I interrupted, motioning to the girl at the counter. I had already ordered and paid for it, but I didn’t want it cold by the time she arrived. The guy working brought her drink over a moment later, smiling flirtatiously at the two of us before returning to work.

After taking a drink, she set her cup down and stared at me a moment. “How’d you know?”

“I have my ways,” I replied cryptically, still holding her gaze as I sipped my own drink. Her brow furrowed in confusion and I could see the allure Mitchell found in puzzling me. True, I hated when I was the one being puzzled, but there was something about a good secret that made riddling another person entertaining.

“I really think I’ve met you somewhere before. I’m almost certain,” she insisted, sitting forward on her elbows. “But it doesn’t make sense because she—she…never mind.” Silence fell between us as she watched her finger run along the rim of her mug.

“She what?” I asked gently. “Died?”

Her bronze eyes shot up at me, surprised but also horrified and hurt. “Yeah;” she studied me carefully as if I were the devil. What I was doing was somewhat evil, I’ll concede, but it probably would have gone a lot worse if I’d come straight out with it from the start—the most likely outcome would be her yelling and storming out, and I couldn’t waste time chasing after her. She needed to arrive at her own conclusion about my identity if I was going to be able to bring her and the others into the fold within the month.

“Are you sure?” I tilted my head to one side, staring at her.

“I was there,” she replied softly, daring me to prove her wrong.

I sauntered to the counter, picking up a napkin on the way there. Using one of their pens, I wrote out Leirba in capital letters and drew an arrow from the A to the L. After thanking the guy at the register, I returned to our table and slid the napkin across its surface so she could read it.

At first, confusion flitted across her face as she tried making sense of it. She even glanced up at me a few times in disbelief. Disbelief and confusion quickly transformed into a bittersweet joy which was tossed aside by grief and guilt, her face disappearing into her hands as silent sobs wracked her body.

“Caroline?” She worried me. I hadn’t any idea she was this shaken by it. No, that’s a lie. I did know. Her entire revolution fell apart because she thought I was dead. Because she blamed herself.

“I’m so sorry, Abs,” she murmured into her hands. “I never meant for any of that to happen; I was trying to prevent anything like that. You weren’t supposed to get hurt. I’m sorry. So, so sorry.”

Laying a hand on her forearm, I said, “You have nothing to be sorry for; you aren’t responsible for what happened.” As I spoke, I worked at untying the knot of sorrow and guilt inside her, pulling the emotions surrounding the event away from her and setting them adrift into the sky; only then was I able to loosen and release the pain of the event. All of it floated through the ceiling in blue and decaying black ribbons; it was almost as beautiful as when I had done the same for Nick upon our first meeting. Of course, then, I hadn’t really known what I was doing. I was just hoping my crazy idea would work.

Eternal: Chapter Two, Part 1

Chapter Two: Fearful Truths

“Drei, we really should talk,” Valetta calmly said when we reached the apartment, though it was more a demand disguised as a suggestion. I wished all of this hushed discussion would be finished; I wasn’t a child and I knew what was happening. There wasn’t any reason I could see to keep me out of the loop when I was in the center.

He nodded as if expecting this. Kissing my cheek, he said, “You and Mitchell should wait for us out here. We shall return to join you shortly.” His eyes didn’t meet mine and I wanted to tell them to just have it out here. They wouldn’t, though; they’d probably just pretend they didn’t know what I was talking about and leave anyway.

Mitchell kicked back in one of the armchairs and I sunk into the middle of the couch. I didn’t want to eavesdrop on their conversation—I could guess it was only a continuation of earlier—but I wanted to know what kind of mood they’d each be in when—if—they returned.

“Go ahead and listen,” Mitchell said, his arms crossed and his eyes closed. “I am.”

“But—”

“It is good to know what mood to expect him in, and Valetta as well. As you know, no harm ever came from eavesdropping;” he tilted his eyes in my direction a moment, a content and mocking smile playing across his lips. “We know. It was almost expected of you.” And here I thought I was doing a fair job at not looking shocked. But I wasn’t going to argue with an open invitation.

“Do not drag me away if you are not going to say anything,” Drei was saying as I tuned in. Splitting my attention further, I mapped the room so I could watch them.

Valetta stood a few feet from Drei, biting a fingernail. “Are you not even ashamed of what you have done?” Her hand batted away a tear on her cheek.

“I am ashamed, and many days I loathe myself for what I have done to her,” Drei answered softly, his hands in his pant pockets.

“You do not act ashamed,” she replied humorously. “No, because if you were ashamed, you would not kiss her in front of us, or hold hands in public, or any number of things that you may be doing with her—sharing a bedroom, for another.”

“I see nothing wrong with any of those. Despite what I have done, I still love her,” he said softly, keeping a firm grasp on his stoicism.

“And turning her is how you show that?”

“I have told you she was dying. What would you have me do?”

Valetta threw her arms up in frustration. “Prevent the situation in the first place? You promised to protect her, to be with her. Where were you?”

“It is complicated.”

“Everything is complicated, Drei. That does not mean you leave her to die and then decide you want her to live.” She turned her back to him, crossing her arms. Soon, one hand flew to her mouth and she chewed her nails again.

“Valetta—”

“It does not even suggest that you take advantage of her. It takes years to control one’s vampire, especially the lust.” She ran a hand through her hair, exhaling heavily to steady herself before turning to him. “Swear you have not taken advantage of that, too.”

“I have not taken advantage of her, at all.”

“But you have,” she argued, advancing on him, pacing circles around him. “First you took advantage of her humanity, and took her mortality from her. Then you take advantage of her love and flaunt that as if you deserved it. Who knows what else you have taken advantage of before that, or even after,” she spat angrily. “So have you, or have you not, taken advantage of her vampire’s lust?”

“No.”

“Do you want to?” she continued, stopping in front of him. “Because wanting to is just as disgraceful as the deed.”

Drei looked away from her, walking past her to the bureau.

“Drei;” she sighed, shaking her head. “I should never have encouraged you. She might very well have been better off with Nick.”

“Do not say that,” he shouted, a few tears tumbling down his cheeks. He clenched his jaw and balled his hands into fists atop the bureau. “Nick would not be able to care for—”

“Nick would have been there to protect her,” she shouted back at him, her voice strong despite the tears filling her eyes.

“You do not even know the circumstances,” Drei said through gritted teeth, turning back to her.

“I know you promised to protect her, and you obviously failed.”

I didn’t like that they were fighting, but I couldn’t bring myself to interrupt them. They needed to have it out, as much as it hurt both of them; it was even hurting me. Valetta was making several good arguments, and I almost wanted to stop listening. Drei was right, though, she didn’t understand the circumstances. I had forgiven Drei for not being there because we were both responsible for it. But I had never before thought about if he had failed. Dying meant I failed, because I couldn’t change anything if I wasn’t alive. Hearing Drei had also failed pained me; I didn’t want it to be true. Even as I realized it was.

“I cannot decide if I want them to take her from you,” Valetta whispered, breaking the silence that had filled the room. “You do not deserve her…but she still needs you.”

“Valetta, I love her. Ten—no, ten thousand times the world over. What do you want me to do to prove I deserve to stay with her? I will do anything.”

“I shall think on it.”

Wiping the tears from my cheeks, I looked up at her as she entered the living room. She had recomposed herself and dried her tears.

“Come, Abriel; you should sleep. Today has been far too…exciting.”

She didn’t sound remotely excited and I wasn’t tired, but saying that wouldn’t have been in anyone’s best interest. Mitchell gave me a quick look as if wishing me luck, or perhaps it was pity; then he stood and went to console Drei. At least, I hoped that’s what he was doing. I would hate for him to have to face Mitchell after Valetta had torn him apart; I wouldn’t listen, though. I wasn’t sure I’d be able to withstand another argument if that should occur, or put words to the pain swirling around me.

“How long has it been?” she asked, sitting at the foot of the bed, staring at the curtained windows.

“A year,” I replied, staring at a wall. I really wasn’t tired and it was strange to be falling asleep without Drei. It felt like missing a part of myself, or having forgotten something important. It was a dark and deep feeling of loss, of desolation.

She didn’t say anything after that, some part of her hoping if I thought she was asleep, then I would follow suit. Valetta should have known better though, especially with her emotions as turbulent as they were. I wasn’t the only one who wouldn’t be sleeping that day.

Vampiric: Chapter Twelve, Part 4

Months passed like hours. The first couple were spent between sleeping and drinking. Against my personal desires, Drei helped me build up a resistance to my thirst, ensuring it would become easier over time. When I was awake, he brought news as I still wasn’t strong enough to leave the room.

I was shocked to hear Caroline’s revolution faltered and failed, withering away until only the bloggers vaguely remembered it had ever existed. Drei had said after she believed me dead, she began to lose heart in her project, blaming herself. Not even Ian could pull her from her guilt long enough to finish a broadcast. Slowly, she lost supporters as the call to action failed to be delivered and the news played it down as a joke. I was somewhat disappointed not even that insult could pull her from her depression.

With that came the truth regarding the shooting. In short, it was an anti-C group led by Martin—bitter at having not been given leadership over the camp—and Conan—sore about being found out as a snake. The long version: they had convinced a group of people that what Caroline was fighting for was far more sinister and would result in the extermination of “the pure.” Those poor dopes were talked into setting up a hit, but not for Caroline. With both of their leaders having a score to settle, and Martin too stupid to realize the revolution wasn’t remotely air-related, they set the hit for me. Martin had convinced Conan I had never been apprehended or killed and thus was the leader, with Caroline simply playing the front woman.

As much as that should have angered me, I felt sorry for them. Drei didn’t say anything explicitly, but I knew he was plotting something. It was against my better half to let him plan, but I overlooked it. They had, after all, shot me three times, even if they hadn’t been the ones to pull the trigger.

Drei also brought me magazines and papers so I could keep up with the rest of current events. At first I ignored them, not wanting to know what was happening, but was soon drawn into the tragedies of the world. It helped to re-motivate me. I had more time, but I wasn’t utilizing it, and I felt somewhat guilty about sleeping it away.

He was ecstatic I still had my element; he had been worried I would have lost it in my turning. To be honest, I had wondered the same thing until I began experimenting. If anything, I felt stronger and more in control. It seemed my turning had worn away any fears I had blocking my full potential. Either that, or it was having death nearly inhabit my body.

Even after I was physically strong enough to leave the room, Drei wouldn’t allow me to leave the apartment. He insisted I couldn’t for a while longer; not until it had all blown over. So to keep me entertained, he would encourage my experiments and shower me with gifts, occasionally kisses—but that was only rarely as he feared my new condition might cloud my judgment. Though often disappointed, I was grateful. It felt like a new entity lived inside me alongside my element. But this one came forward at his touch and terrified me. Drei promised I would adjust to that as well, learning to eventually control it.

One evening, after nine months of healing and adjusting, I sat watching the news; Drei was in the kitchen. They were covering a protest over a newly endangered rainforest and a recent natural disaster in a Pacific Island nation. Somewhere between the stories and everything else they reported, something clicked in my mind. Something rather unexpected.

“Drei?” I called, trying to determine how I felt. My mind raced between excited, frightened, serious, and calm.

“Yes?” he replied, handing me a mug of blood. I could feel his eyes taking in my mind’s dilemma before finally deciding on serious excitement.

“I think I know what I’m supposed to do,” I whispered, saying it aloud causing a bubble of excitement in my chest. I could barely contain myself. After so long, it seemed ridiculously easy to not have discovered forever ago.

“Truly?” he asked, measuring my response and not wanting to be taken in by a false alarm.

Staring at him, almost unable to see him for watching my idea bloom before me—taking definite shape and seeming to smile back at me—I knew it was too right to be wrong. I couldn’t be wrong; not this time. Not about this.

“I’m certain.”

End Book Two

Vampiric: Chapter Twelve, Part 1

Chapter Twelve: The Missing Pieces of the Puzzle

Wherever I had ended up was dark. In all my imaginings of death, I had never thought it would be dark. It had always been bright—on the brink of blinding—with a gentle melody leading me along to a place full of people who knew me, who had been waiting for me. To be in darkness made my failure seem far more stark.

“Before I explain,” Drei’s voice said from the darkness, “I need to tell you the story you’ve been requesting to hear.”

Hearing him so close wasn’t a comfort. I was terrified by the thoughts of what could have happened to him, especially after I had wanted him to stay safe. Being here—if it was where I thought I was—was not by any means safe.

“Where are you?” I asked, my voice harsh, my throat dry and constricted. Another oddity; I didn’t think death meant you still suffered bodily needs like thirst.

A lamp came on, temporarily blinding me. Once my eyes adjusted from the shock, I saw Drei sat on the edge of a nearby chair, hunched forward and seeming unable to look at me.

“Right here,” he whispered, his eyes dark and sorrowful.

The light partially illuminated the room around us. The entire space was dark, heavy curtains drawn over what appeared to be the only window. I had been tucked under sheets and thick woolen blankets on a bed. Thus far, the only thing consistent with my imaginings of death was that I didn’t feel like myself; something was very odd and not quite right with me.

 “Everything will make sense when I finish,” Drei said; I could have sworn I could feel his insecurity. That couldn’t be, though, because I remembered losing touch with the air in the hospital. I decided to trust Drei would make sense of this all.

“Okay,” I said, watching him carefully.

“Nearly 400 years ago, before I was turned, I met someone,” he said softly, the shame rising from the memory engulfing him. “At the time, I was finishing my studies at university. A few of my peers went to celebrate the end of exams, though most of us had another the following day. It was at the pub where she noticed and seduced me. There was no hiding what she was doing; she openly admitted what she wanted. When I resisted, insisting I could not partake that night, nor anytime soon as I was returning home after the commencement exercises, she told me I would be unable to resist her. Unfortunately, that was also the truth.

“She released me from her spell long enough to pass my final exam and receive my diploma. I had planned to make my escape after the ceremony and return home, but she awaited my exit and seduced me anew. I spent the next several weeks with her, not realizing how much time had elapsed until a letter arrived from home, requesting my immediate return. She was livid, insisting I would be unable to leave.” He rubbed his temples as though he could still hear her protests. “I knew I had to go. I missed my sisters, and she had underestimated the strength of my love for them. So one day, as she rested, I left, hoping that was the last I would see of that place.”

“What happened?” I asked, my voice still scratchy but slowly returning to normal.

Running an unsteady hand through his hair, he said, “A month later, she showed up in my bed chambers. There was no way she could have been there, let alone have known that is where I was. She scolded me for leaving her, insisting it had been a poor choice. That I wanted to please her, keep her contented, or she would drain me. It was my first indication as to her true nature. She presented me an option, then: I could devote myself to her and leave my family straight away, or I could deny her. Though she guaranteed I would not like the consequences of denying her, I…I could not imagine disappearing from my sisters’ lives. They needed me…they were still young and impressionable…you understand.” His voice was pleading, as if trying to convince me they didn’t deserve their fate, whatever it had been. “And I believed myself intelligent and resourceful enough to elude whatever consequences she promised.”

“Drei,” I whispered, not wanting him to continue. His hands and voice shook from the pain of the memory; I reached a hand out to him, though he was just out of reach. For as long as I had wanted to know, I didn’t want him plagued by remembering after he had worked so hard to forget. I hated seeing him pained, especially when there was little I could do about it.

“No, you must know to understand,” he asserted, moving his seat closer and taking my hand. I could still feel the pain and shame clouding the air around him, but the contact seemed to renew his resolve and stop his trembling.

“For weeks she showed up, issuing the same offer, and each time I remained insistent on staying. One evening, I had been taking a stroll, considering my future and whatnot when she appeared. I thought she was there for the same reason she had been the nights previously, so I ignored her. Until she stopped me. She teased me a while, asking for another chance to fix things between us. When I explained I would have to refuse her, she stalled with small talk. After an appropriate interval of time, she let me go with no proposal, no threats or consequences. I was sure I had finally convinced her she did not need me. How naïve I was,” Drei lamented, cradling his head in his free hand, gripping tighter to mine.

Vampiric: Chapter Eleven, Part 1

Chapter Eleven: Tear Stained

I couldn’t tell if I was in pain. It might have been so intense I couldn’t recognize that’s what it was; but it might have been nonexistent, and my brain was just trying to find it.

On the ambulance ride, the EMT kept talking, kept saying the same things Caroline had. She was there, too—still hysterical and panicking—demanding he do something while he argued he was trying and needed her to calm down. As they fussed around me, trying to stop the bleeding in my back, everything started blurring on the edge of my vision. It wasn’t long before I couldn’t make out any of his features, but Caroline was easy to differentiate; her hair was flaming, almost as brilliantly as she was. Her element seemed to be wrapped around her in bright crimson ribbons. Even after I blinked, trying to clear my vision, the ribbons were still there.

The blurriness didn’t go away as another group of nurses and doctors swarmed me. They were all talking, reading stats and asking questions. None of them seemed to have faces, though a few had blue or green ribbons wrapped around them. The only thing that made sense was trying to stabilize my condition—at least until they figured out the extent of the damage—and whether it would be better or worse to remove the bullets.

One thing that scared me was the stale air they kept forcing into my lungs. It wasn’t the air I was afraid of; it was how it didn’t feel right in my system. That, and the fact I didn’t seem connected to the air around me anymore. Before I could have improved my hearing, picked up on other’s emotions and thoughts. Now, I couldn’t do any of that. And, worse yet, it felt like I was going deaf. All of the chatter from the nurses was dying away into oblivion. Even Caroline’s screaming voice was being pulled away until it was barely a whisper.

“Let me through,” someone was saying, his voice coming across clearly despite having lost all of the others. It rang in my ears, startling, comforting, and familiar. “Abriel,” he whispered, his voice drowning out all of the other noise.

“Drei,” I breathed shakily. A blinding pain shot through me as if talking was against the rules. It died away and I could feel his hands wrapped around mine, his lips brushing against my knuckles.

I couldn’t begin to explain how strange it was to see him, for him to be there. He hadn’t spoken to me in almost eight months. In two thirds of a year. Yet here he was, as if nothing had ever separated us. Though I couldn’t feel anything inside me, I was willing to bet my heart was racing.

A white shape passed by the door and Drei followed it, demanding to talk to whomever it was.

“What are you planning to do that will heal her?” he demanded, leaving no question they would do otherwise. I couldn’t make out what the white shape was saying, but Drei responded, “I am the closest to family she has. What are the options?”

It was a long time before Drei answered whatever babble the shape had spilled. I had closed my eyes, trying not to think about dying. Even if everyone else would like to think they could delay it, I could feel it setting in. It was why the air wasn’t responding to me anymore. At this point, it was inevitable but I seemed to be the only one aware of it. What was worse wasn’t that I was dying; it was I still hadn’t done the one experiment I had wanted to try.

But he was here. If my heart stopped beating in the next moment, I would be okay with it. As much as I disliked her way of bringing him back to me, she did. And for that, I was eternally grateful.

“So if I say yes to the procedure, she may live?” Drei asked, still conversing with the white shape. There was more soft murmuring and then he replied, “Do it. Whatever it takes, do it.”

When he returned to my side, I wanted to tell him no. It wasn’t worth it. He was only putting off what was bound to happen.

“They will take you soon,” he whispered, brushing my hair back. “I shall be waiting here when you wake.” I wanted to promise I’d wake up again, but I couldn’t guarantee it; I couldn’t even force the words out. “You will wake again.”

He followed them as they prepared to take me into the operating room. Part of me knew he couldn’t be there with me, but it didn’t stop me from wishing he would be. Just in case I wasn’t able to see him again.