Vampiric: Chapter Eight, Part 7

The next night was my first night as secretary during a broadcast. Drei was there, but as Caroline had said earlier, he was the biggest guy she had. She needed him as much as she claimed to need me. I purposely waited until last to brief the bodyguards for the night. Some people even commented on the orderliness of their briefing sheet. Though I smiled and made small talk, I couldn’t help wondering if I could keep a rein on myself tonight.

It wasn’t long before Drei was the only one I hadn’t addressed. Breathing in deeply, I made my way over to him.

“You’re just outside the broadcasting room tonight,” I said, focusing on my clipboard. I handed over his briefing page and waited a moment.

“Very well,” he replied, his voice cold, but not as scathing as it had been.

I wanted so much in that moment to tell him I still loved him. But I didn’t. Instead, I walked back to the office to let Caroline know everyone was set, we could go any time.

“Great,” she said, pulling her hair back in a severe bun. “Oh, do you need anything?” she asked before I could turn to leave. “Are you okay? Nothing happened, right?”

I smiled at her—weak as it was, it was the best I could muster. “It’s all business, right?”

“It should be—on these nights, anyway;” she watched me carefully, unsure whether to make heads or tails of my current emotionality.

“Then I’ll be fine.” As we left the office together, I said, “If you ask me tomorrow, you might get a different answer. Just so you know.”

She laughed, saying, “I’ll have to remember that.”

What I didn’t tell her was while it didn’t hurt to talk to him, it hurt to think about what his reaction to anything I said about us would be. At least that took precedence over what hurt more—which was having to keep anything I wanted to say to him a secret.

Vampiric: Chapter Seven, Part 12

Drei was back to disappearing before I could catch him, and I couldn’t miss anymore of Caroline’s calls without some repercussion. I hated that this was what we had been reduced to. We might as well have been time sharers.

It was a week before the next broadcast when we finally happened to be there at the same time. I was just arriving home from another meeting. Drei was sitting on the couch reading a newspaper.

“Can we talk?” I asked cautiously, hanging my purse on a rung of the coat rack.

Drei gazed at me a long moment before setting his paper down. Sitting across from him, I asked the first and most important question I had thought of: “What happened?” His brow furrowed, and before he could demand some clarification, I added, “Between us. Why are you avoiding me and angry, and cold all of the time? What did I do?”

“You are not aware?” he asked quietly, his amethyst eyes flat and stony. I hadn’t seen his eyes so cold since Nick had been at camp. And even then, they had rarely been directed at me.

“I wouldn’t even know where to begin guessing.”

“Let me give you a few clues, then;” the ice in his tone suggested I really had done something and, whatever it was, it could not be easily forgiven. “Our arrival here your first day back? Your new position? Still no? Then you leave me for her. In the middle of something intimate—for me, at least.”

“Caroline? What does she have to do with anything?”

“It is more painful to lie, Abriel;” his features were stoic though his voice betrayed pain and anger. “I witnessed you kiss her that day. This promotion, the phone calls, they are all a ruse. You can tell me.”

“But it isn’t. Nothing happens. I don’t even know—”

“You do not have to lie or justify it. Just be honest.”

“But I’m not lying;” I felt tears press at my eyes and my throat start to tighten. My mouth felt dry and I could barely swallow.

“I have trusted for years what I see. I am not about to change that because you want me to.” He stood, turning away from me. So this really was all her fault. She was the reason he was tearing my heart out of his chest.

“I’m not lying,” I choked, drowning in the accusations and clues and thoughts flooding my mind.

“Just admit it!” He turned suddenly, grabbing the arm rests of my chair. His flaming and vibrantly dark eyes were inches from mine.

“I can’t. Not when you don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“You love her, just say it! Stop lying to me. Stop pretending your affections belong to me. Just stop it all!”

I covered my mouth and shook my head, trying to contain my anguish and shake out all of the hurtful words. “I’m working for her because of you…because I love you. You told me I needed her; you told me to go back to work for her because she needed me.”

“I did not think you would make a relationship of it.” He pushed off from the chair; though he stood upright, his head was bowed and his shoulder slumped.

“I did it for you. I love you…so I did what you wanted.”

“Your fickleness is not something I desire,” he whispered, turning away.

I bit my lip. He wouldn’t listen; he was too stubborn and set in his belief of this. If he knew me at all, how could he possibly think this about me? It didn’t seem probable in the least. I think that’s what hurt the most. He didn’t know me well enough to trust I wasn’t lying to him.

Trying to hold myself together, I asked, “Do you want me to leave?”

Slowly shuffling away, he didn’t bother to turn back to me. “It might be for the best.”

Unable to stand looking back, I grabbed my purse and shoes and ran from the apartment, still trying to keep it together by forcing myself to breathe slowly, but my chest was too tight and the air seemed too thin.

Outside, I sat on a bench, staring at the blurred phone in my hand. Caroline and Ian were the only other people I knew around there. But Caroline had started all of this and Ian was her friend. It would feel like an admission of guilt to call and ask for their support. For their help. Yet, I didn’t have anywhere else to go.

Before I could make up my mind to do anything, the phone sang out its piano melody.

“Look,” Caroline began before I could say anything. “A problem came up with one of the people we chose, so we have to pick someone else.”

I tried to answer, I really did. I was determined not to cry on the phone to her, not even sure I wanted her help. She was partially responsible for this and I hadn’t begun to think through how I felt about that.

“Where are you?”

Realizing the depth of the situation, I couldn’t help but break down into tears. Drei didn’t love me because I had done what he had wanted. I didn’t have a place to stay anymore. To top things off, my heart was shattered by the one person I never thought could hurt me. Who would never willingly choose to hurt me.

“Abs?” She sounded worried. I wished I could tell her I was fine, but I couldn’t stop the gasping sobs shaking my body. It didn’t feel like I had any control left over anything. “Oh, god, Abs,” she said into the phone, her voice tremulous. “I’ll be there as soon as I can. Don’t move.” The phone fell from my hand as I sat there, crying, hugging myself, and trying to keep the rest of me from shattering as well.

Vampiric: Chapter Seven, Part 11

Purposely taking up more time, I wrote a note and pinned it to his door, insisting we needed to talk, even if he had to wake me up. Then, walking at nearly a maddeningly slow pace, I made my way outside and slipped into the passenger seat.

“Take long enough?” Ian asked jovially, speeding off.

“Sorry if I’m not Little Miss Sunshine;” I stared out the window.

“Something wrong already?”

“You obviously wouldn’t understand.” Although he tried to make small talk—possibly an attempt to cheer me up before we met Caroline—I ignored him, adding another thing on my list why I wished I had never met her.

The meeting was to finalize our employee list—since she was adding a few more, but had interviewed probably 20 people—and for her to thank me for redoing the charts—finally finished and filed.

All I could think of doing was going back to the apartment and waiting up for Drei. I didn’t care if he didn’t return until the next day or if Caroline called a hundred times before then. I set up camp on the couch, my phone off and charging, the lights off, and my mind racing. I only wished we could work this out; unfortunately, I wasn’t sure anymore if he wanted the same thing.

Around midnight, there was a knock on the door, which I ignored. Drei had a key; he wouldn’t need me to let him in. He probably wouldn’t assume I’d be there to do so. I continued staring into space. A few hours later, another knock came, louder and more insistent. Around the time the sky began to lighten, Drei entered.

“We need to talk,” I said, rising to face him. Then I noticed Ian standing behind him.

“A shame work came calling.” Drei, not even seeming disappointed, went straight to his room and closed the door, letting the note hang there unnoticed.

“Have you been here all bloody night?” Ian cried, immediately on his phone.

With nothing else I could do, shy of breaking down his door and locking Ian out, I picked up the fully charged phone and turned it on, greeted by fifty messages; there were probably more missed calls than that.

“I’m with her now,” Ian said, pacing in the entranceway. “Yes. We’re going now,” he said, shooting me a tight-lipped look; I hadn’t thought it was possible to anger Ian.

Needless to say, Caroline was pissed because my phone was shut off and, according to her, she had been worried sick about me. I didn’t care. My relationship was falling apart; Drei was a complete stranger to me anymore. When I had first met him, we hadn’t been this foreign to each other. And what was worse, I didn’t know how to fix it. I wasn’t sure there was a way. So as Caroline droned on, berating me in between explaining why she had wanted us there, I was debating if I could even try anymore. If it was possible for me to take anymore.

Vampiric: Chapter Seven, Part 10

The following morning, Drei still wasn’t back, but it didn’t take long for Caroline to call me. Ian picked me up shortly after and drove to the same place as the night before. In the sunlight, it looked even more desolate, as though it might collapse if you sneezed at it.

This time she was waiting for us when he parked. A heap of folders and papers were tossed into my arms the minute I was standing upright.

“Those are the charts. It has everyone’s positions on them as well as their profiles and what we know about each one. This is your copy. If you change or add anything, you have to do the same with my copy,” she said, hands on her hips, staring at the pile in my arms. “There’s some other stuff in there, too. Mostly information and assignments on the next broadcast. You’ll have to make printouts for every person working that night to hand out beforehand. Well, everyone who has something specific or important written in the assignments folder.”

She started to walk off in the opposite direction of her office, Ian following a step behind, before she turned back. “I almost forgot,” she said, smiling in her carefree way, tossing me a key. “Don’t lose it,” she warned. “It’s to my office. You should get acquainted with where everything is. If I can’t find something,” she said, turning back around and walking off again, “it’s you I call.”

Thus was the official start of my new secretarial responsibilities. After acquainting myself with her files—realizing how disorganized she was—I sat down to her computer to begin typing out the assignment sheets. Those, once printed, went into a new folder so I wouldn’t lose them. When I was done with that, I crammed what I could into my purse and, carrying the rest, left, walking to the nearest working bus stop and hitching a ride back to the apartment.

Drei was asleep in his room, a heavy blanket over the window to block out what the curtains didn’t. I left him alone, wishing he would be around and awake so we could talk about what was bothering him—I sensed it was something more than my needing to leave abruptly the previous night. I was starting to believe Caroline was right and he was letting something stew instead of talking to me about it, possibly whatever had happened to make him dislike her.

I sat at the coffee table and began reading through the papers. I didn’t know who had put them together, but it was a mess that was quickly driving me as crazy as Mom. Stopping just before reaching a point of wanting to tear my hair out, I left and returned an hour later with paper and colored pens. I was going to scrap the old charts after I remade them.

Those charts took a week. Not because they were particularly difficult, but because, originally, there were eight charts with all of the positions and first names written in. I simplified the charts for future use, only marking down the positions and creating a separate chart for each group of people. Also, I made sheets detailing the positions of each person in any set. That was the most time consuming, mostly because once I had two sets made—one copy for Caroline, one for me—I had to make a copy for each person on the list. True, there was probably some computer program I could have used, and perhaps I would do so later on, but working by hand filled the long, lonely hours and kept my mind busy.

Every night during that week, I fell asleep on the couch. Without fail, Caroline would wake me up by calling. There were a total of 17 calls from her, four of which were while I was working in her office; those meetings covered everything from the location of the next broadcast to new employees and security. While I saw plenty of her and Ian, I didn’t see Drei unless he was asleep. His waking presence was apparent, though; when she did wake me, I found someone had covered me with a blanket. Despite this, I failed to ever come across him. Needing to speak with him, but unable to, I focused even more on finishing the charts.

The next broadcast was still a couple weeks away when Drei and I were finally home at the same time. I had just woken up—surprisingly, it wasn’t because of Caroline. Still slightly groggy, I heard him walking past rather than saw him.

“Wait;” I reached blindly out with one hand, the other still clearing sleep from my eyes.

Sitting up, I watched him shrug into his coat and reach for the door; I did the only thing I could to stop him from leaving. Manipulating the air, I shoved his hand aside.

“I said wait.”

He tried again, and this time I wasn’t as nice.  Shoving him sideways into the kitchenette, I stood and was soon blocking his way out.

“We need to talk.”

“What about?” he questioned grudgingly, his eyes frighteningly cold.

“Well…” I had been waiting for this moment but had failed to develop any specific questions. “For starters, why are you avoiding me?”

“I have not been avoiding you,” he said, though he shifted his weight from foot to foot and wouldn’t meet my eyes.

“I didn’t think you’d lie to me about that,” I whispered, shoving my hair behind an ear. “I haven’t seen you in over a week.”

“We have both been busy.”

“Amazing how you’re suddenly busy after I get promoted,” I snapped before I could stop myself. I dragged my fingers through my hair, breathing deeply. “That’s not what I meant to say.” This was already going so wrong and now I was trying to make it out to be a power trip? Slumping against one of the cabinets and hiding my face, I tried to think of something to say that would help fix this all. “I—Drei—”

My phone started ringing.

“You had better answer. Caroline does not strike me as particularly patient.”

“We still need to talk,” I said, knowing he was right.

“Then do not answer.” When I didn’t move—partially pissed off he could even suggest that—he added, “You know you want to.”

“I don’t want to,” I said, hating the constricted feeling of my throat. Caroline was ruining what could have been a healing moment for Drei and I, something we wouldn’t need if she had never come into our lives.

“Then do not answer.”

Though I knew I needed to, I debated which I needed to do more: talk with Drei or answer Caroline. Just before the ringer quit, I answered, hearing Drei’s disappointed sigh. I didn’t see how he had a right to be disappointed when he was being the difficult one.

“Can you give me half an hour?”

“If we are going to discuss anything,” Drei said behind me, “we shall need more than half an hour.”

“No,” Caroline replied shortly. “I need you now. That’s why I’m calling now.”

“Please,” I begged, knowing I needed to at least spend some time talking with Drei.

“What could be more important than me needing you here?” she asked, a note of incredulity to her voice.

I wanted to tell her there were a lot of things more important, but I couldn’t. Not without unleashing her full wrath—or mine, for that matter. Instead, I said, “This, Caroline. Please.”

“No, and Ian will be there shortly;” she hung up.

“You act as though you did not expect as much.”

Despite my growing frustration with him, I wrapped my arms around him, trying to think of something to say. Trying to convince myself I wouldn’t go…not now. Even though he was stiff in my arms, I didn’t let go; I couldn’t so long as I believed there might be a chance—even if it was in hell.

“It is apparent both of us must be going, so let us not delay.” With that, he broke my embrace and disappeared again, slipping through my fingers.

Vampiric: Chapter Seven, Part 6

 “You beat me here?” Caroline stopped at the table I had chosen in the café; she was dressed in her usual black skinny jeans paired with a bright red kimono-esque blouse.

The cafe was a small, popular place, always full of people. If you asked me, it was overpriced but the atmosphere managed to feel rustic and down-to-earth. The natural wood furniture was accented with the soothing greens and blues of the walls. A few throw rugs in earthy tones and some low table lamps finished off the space, creating an ideal place for anyone in need of creativity or, in our case, a casual business locale.

“I didn't have anything else to do.” I sipped my cinnamon chai latte. I didn’t have a job and was mostly confined to the apartment—by her recommendation.

“Then you won't mind while I get something?” She motioned towards the counter.

“Mocha chai?” I asked, nodding to the other mug on the table.

She smiled, sitting down across from me. “Two percent?”

“I didn't think you'd go for skim.”

“How'd you know?” She grinned.

“Remember that first time we met?” She nodded, sipping her drink. “I just remembered from then.”

“But I don't remember telling you what I had? Did I?” Her brow furrowed slightly.

“You didn't.  But if you remember, you didn't need to.”

“Right,” she said, suddenly perking up. “Air. I almost forgot.”

“So what's this promotion?” My hands wrapped around the mug. Despite it being well into the upper 90's outside, inside the cafe was freezing. I was grateful I had opted to wear a white half jacket with my otherwise seasonally appropriate attire. That was mostly to hide the scars, though.

Caroline reached into her handbag, sliding a flip phone across the table. I cocked an eyebrow at her.

“I know it’s practically archaic, but it’s a burner and it’s more durable than a lot of what is available anymore.”

I nodded, still a touch skeptical. It seemed more like the cheap choice than the logical one, but I also wasn’t the one bankrolling her endeavor. “So why do I need this?”

“Since you're coming back, I'm giving you a new job. A better one. Relatively safer,” she said, sitting up straighter as her tone became more authoritative. “Drei says you were the one who tipped him off on Conan. You'll be glad to know you were right. He wasn't on our side.”

“He's the reason they found us the second time.” I remembered that night vividly. Conan’s dismissal was somewhat of a relief. He had been a shady character and altogether too comfortable, especially with me.

“And he's the reason we didn't have an untraceable line. They looked at it later on and someone had reprogrammed it.”

“So Conan did that, too?”

“The night before. Anyway, since then I've been short a secretary. A few people tried it out and weren't up for it. They wanted days off, had kids to worry about, another job, so on and so forth;” Caroline rolled her eyes. “The last few months, Ian's been doubled up as driver and secretary but he hates the job. I know this, but there's no one else. But now there's you.”

“And this is for…?” I brandished the cell phone.

“The reason everyone else failed,” she said simply. “As secretary, you're on call. When I need you, you drop whatever it is you're doing and high tail it to where I need you. Even if it's at two in the morning. No questions, and there's no compromise. It's the toughest job anyone gets. The plus side is, there's more work, and there's more pay for it, especially if you do it well.” She drank more of her latte. “But the big thing is, when you're called, you’re there.”

“I don't have a car.” Maybe she didn’t see that as a problem, but it looked like a pretty huge one from where I was sitting.

“No worries. Ian can pick you up;” she shrugged. “I'll call you first; you tell me where you are, and then Ian will pick you up on his way.”

“Won't he hate that after a while?” I didn’t want to put him out. He seemed like a fairly laid back person, but who, other than Caroline, really knew?

“You'll see how silly that question is after you get to know Ian.” She raised her cup to me and took a swallow. I took a drink from mine also, waiting for whatever she planned to say next. “And you'll get to know him, too. He's always there. Aside from myself, he's the only one who knows everything. That's another perk,” she added. “Being secretary, you know more of the big picture than everyone else.”

“That's not so bad, I guess;” I stared down at the phone. More of the plan meant knowing more about how everything worked and that really was what I needed in the long run. Knowing how to keep most somewhat in the dark was good to know, but actually running the show was another business.

My concern was if I could handle this. Being on call was a lot of responsibility, especially since it meant keeping a cell phone on me at all times when I hadn’t had one in what felt like ages.

I started laughing, unintentionally.

Caroline’s face sunk. “What is it?”

“Nothing,” I said, waving it off, trying not to start laughing at her concern. “I just thought I might have to start carrying a purse again.” A smile cracked her lips as I admitted, “I haven't carried a purse in years.”

“It's not so bad,” she admitted, half laughing.

Thinking on it, I realized the last time I had taken a purse anywhere was when I had lost control—that was also the last time I had carried a cell phone with me anywhere. It seemed strange that so many things pivoted around that one event. Then again, it did change my entire life. If it had never happened, I wouldn't be sitting across from Caroline receiving a promotion in her project. I wouldn't have kissed Drei, ever. And, neglecting the negative, I never would have met my mom. Who would have thought one event would have had such a powerful domino effect? And don’t even pretend you did.